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Here’s the thing about blogging: There’s no guarantee that anyone will ever read what you write. To put words out there, into the ether, and hope they land in the eyes and ears of the right folks (or any folks at all) necessitates a profound act of faith. I don’t care whether you blog about spirituality or soba noodles, God or government — you might as well shout your opinions into the mouth of a cave. Perhaps a daring spelunker will catch your cries. Or maybe a hibernating bear will swivel a deaf ear in your direction, heave a sigh, and go back to sleep. You never know.

I’ve been writing this blog (with my two dear friends) for two years now. That’s two years of intense belief that what I have to say is worth saying. But to whom? If I’m doing this for other people, then I’m doing it wrong. Every week, I release a little amoeba of thought into the vast ocean of the Internet. The odds of it wending its way to those who really need it are about a billion to one. It’s like finding a needle, not in a haystack, but in a field of hay the size of the Mall of America.

No. I must be doing this for myself. It is the only thing that makes any sense. With this realization comes a follow-up question: Why? Clearly, I’m passionate about the things I write about. Admittedly, I want to be heard. Which then leads to the big question: If a blog is posted, and nobody reads it, does it — like the proverbial tree in the forest — make a sound?

But if I’m doing this for me, why should I care? Aye, there’s the rub! I do care. So, my spiritual battle comes down to this: A brawl between my soul and my ego. I need to not care whether anyone reads this. It needs to be something I do for me, just like the hobbies SueBE wrote about in her post this week — something that sustains me for the journey, not something that saps me of my will to keep marching on.

So yeah, I want to keep doing this. And I will. And if a nugget of wisdom lands in your lap, good for you. But good for me for keeping up the conversation…even if nobody is on the other end. After all, God is always listening.

Have a Mary Little Christmas

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