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credit: today.com
Let’s say you had a meeting and it was crunch time. Looking over the attendees, you realize there’s a baby sitting in one of the chairs in a suit and tie. Now, that’s something you don’t see every day!
Look at you. You can’t even hold your own head up, man! You’re drooling, babbling on about nothing, and your contribution at the last meeting was nothing but a big pile of poop. Get ahold of yourself!
You notice the baby’s round belly under his pocket protector and bib.
You’re letting yourself go around the middle, there, pal. You really should do some crunches!
You wouldn’t expect a baby to know how to crunch numbers. Heck, they can’t even crunch granola yet! And surely a baby’s too young to hit the gym.
Different rules apply to people depending on the situation, and we don’t all develop at the same pace. Some may think that, just because they haven’t had an experience, that experience isn’t valid.
People who call others “snowflake” or “overly sensitive” are actually, let me see if I can find the technical term here in my thesaurus.. Oh yes. Insensitive clods!
Mercy. Let me re-phrase that.
Such people don’t seem to have been born with a compassion compass, that thing inside that says, I may not understand what you’ve been through, but I can see that you’ve been profoundly affected by it.
Then again, if I label them insensitive clods, I’m the one being insensitive.
Perhaps a better way to frame it is that they’re newborns in terms of the expression of empathy. Their mercy-muscles haven’t formed fully yet. One day they may be in a new situation and it’ll be crunch time for them. Here’s hoping the people in that room will show them some compassion.
I’m convinced that the totality of woes in this world are utterly determined, enacted and exacerbated by human selfishness — the almighty “I.” You know: I am the center of the universe; my needs are most important; everyone who isn’t me is other, and they are the problem. What we entirely forget is that we completely dependent upon one another, not just for day-to-day life, but for the overall progress of humankind. When it comes to saving the planet, saving the future or saving our souls, I is not going to cut it.
We must change our capital “I’s” into lowercase ones. For instance: I explain, sermonize, pontificate, demand; i listen. I order the world for my own benefit; i put the good of others first. I build walls; i build bridges. (You get it.) If we fail, humanity fails. No less than that hangs in the balance.
Let us whittle our serifs into tittles. (No, I’m not being obscene; “tittle” is the name of the dot on the lowercase I; serifs are the decorative little lines on a capital I.) It is the only way to become like Jesus. Yes, I know the consensus is to capitalize all things God-related out of respect, but Jesus was the littlest “i” person in all of history. Everything he did was for us — not just the “us” who lived in Middle East during his time, but all of us, for all generations, including those yet unborn. Jesus saved all of us from eternal death. Let me put it this way: Think of how many people Jesus actually knew. Now think of how many people Jesus has saved. It takes great heart and complete abandonment of ego to give one’s life not just for your friends, but for people on the other side of the planet, centuries apart from your own existence. None of us can even imagine doing that, much less do it.
The world has nearly come to ruin numerous times because of big I’s. It has always been saved by small ones. So, which do you choose? As for me, I’ll just be over here whittling down my serifs.
If you’ve been reading the meme’s that I’ve posted throughout the week, you’ve seen that quite a few of them have to do with patience. When I first saw these Lenten quotes about patience I was a bit . . . what? What does patience have to do with Lent?
The more I think about it, the more that I realize that patience is a huge part of Lent.
Lent is all about awaiting the coming dawn. Waiting, to put it simply, is not my strong suit. I want it now. No really. NOW would be better than later.
But that isn’t always the case. Waiting and patience give us time for preparation. Preparation can make the difference between success and a failure. I know this, but I’m still not very good at waiting.
Lent is also a time of turning into the light. It is a time for us to remove what stands between us and God’s light. It is a time of helping us remove what keeps other people from seeing God’s light in us.
Quite often that requires patience. Patience to take care of what ever it is in us that keeps us from being Christ’s hands on earth. Patience to listen to what the other person has to say, because until we know what is in their hears and their minds, we very often have no clue what they need.
Patience. It is a key part of empathy.
Patience. It is most truly something that I need today.
–SueBE
Early this week, someone asked if I thought American’s had too little empathy. I didn’t have to think very long. Yes, I think we lack empathy. Of course, I meant other people, not my friend or I.
As so often happens, something happened later in the week that would bring this conversation to mind.
During a swim meet, I was chatting with one of the other moms. She said something about “just wait ‘til these boys get a taste of the real world.”
I’m not sure how much more reality most teens can take. As I looked down at the deck, I saw the boy whose father was killed 18 months ago in a traffic accident. There were the twins whose mother died of breast cancer and the brothers whose parents are divorcing but can’t afford to live apart so they’ve divided the house.
“High school isn’t easy.” I didn’t want to air other people’s issues but I had to say something.
“Look, they don’t have mortgages or have to work all day,” she said.
“No, but they have shelter in place and school shootings. And bullying and gay bashing. Do you know how many gay teens a year attempt suicide?”
“Anyone who takes that way out is defective.”
Defective. That was the word that pushed me over the edge. I would like to say I took a deep breath and said a little prayer. But I didn’t. In my mother’s words, I got on my high horse.
I will never ever agree with what she said, but I do get the irony. She has no empathy with high schoolers and I have no empathy with her.
And I’ve been beating myself up about it for days. But that’s pretty ironic too.
I made a mistake. I’m kind of defective that way. That’s why I need grace. And those boys need grace. And so do all the moms, dads and coaches. Because we all mess up and, far too often, we completely fail to empathize with each other.
Fortunately, even then we can turn to God. We can pour out our hearts and bemoan our failings. We can rant and rave and fuss. And, in the end, in spite of our defects, His Grace will be there for us all. Thank God.
–SueBE
Last week, Pastor Carol quoted the Reverend Christopher Keating in her sermon. “Entitlement keeps us from living as thankful people.”
When she said this, a murmur rippled across the congregation. Later that day several people posted about it on Facebook.
That comment has echoed through my soul all week long.
When we believe that we deserve something, we cannot be truly grateful. After all, why should we feel grateful. Its ours. We earned it. Having it is our right.
How then do we justify that we have so much when others have so very little? Honey, we don’t have to justify it. Haven’t you been listening? We DESERVE it. What’s to justify?
I’ll tell you what we have to justify. Our attitude.
It’s bad enough that we feel entitled for having so much, but we tend to extend this attitude to the less fortunate. We have what we deserve, and so do they. If they would only apply themselves, get off the dole and work, they could turn their lives around. We deserve what we have and they have what they deserve.
Not only does an attitude of entitlement block gratitude, it also blocks compassion. With so little compassion, how can we love each other as He told us to do? Isn’t that something that they are entitled to? It is, after all, in the Bible.
–SueBE